The Perfect Guy was a Fraud!

Author: Nancy B.K

Was the story intended for public view?  I am yet to find that out. You see we are all born to be wise by the admonitions taught.

The Perfect Guy Movie

I once gave up on everything, the work of not becoming myself just to become perfect and looking for the perfect guy. NOTE: If you are looking for the perfect guy, then you need to watch some thriller called ‘The perfect guy’… forgetting that we are the ones to make our partners perfect because Mr.  & Ms. Perfect don’t exist, save for movie scripts and Mexican soap operas. You know the likes of Alejandro & Maximiliano from the soap operas. They say everyone is perfect in their own way but “my way” I still don’t know where it lies because as I came to learn Nobody’s perfect. Let’s say it’s because I haven’t got my ‘Mr. Right’, but is there really such a thing like a perfect partner? Maybe there is one out there perfectly created for me.

Let me tell you of one, Alex “my ideal perfect guy”, “My Alejandro”, like they say he was my soul mate…bae!

 I am 20 years old fresh in Campus, this is the time to take big risks in life (practice safe sex) hehehe! “Thinking out loud”, travel as much as you want and the absolute best time to do that crazy thing you’ve always dreamt of.  Back to my story, He never stops till he gets what he wants, Alex. He appeared to be the cool new guy in town.

“You are so lovely”.  He said as he approached our table, my friends and I had just been invited to a birthday party and we were all dressed to kill. So this cute guy approaches our table, says hi to all but me. Just before I give up and say he is not going to even have a look at me,  he suddenly walks over to my side, pulls a chair and seats next to me then says loudly, “You are so lovely”. This is one of the things I always wanted to be told at twenty because it’s the right time to be friendly and optimistic. I didn’t view him as a stranger but rather as someone whom I have known for quite some time, despite the fact that we had just met.

 I felt “nimegonga jackpot”. He was so muscular; six pack kind of a guy. To be honest, he was a hunk that every lady would fall for even me, though I didn’t openly show it, but again you don’t have to show it at first sight because Kenyan men will always think of you as being desperate….which actually I think I was. Long story short, we exchanged contacts and I celebrated in my heart knowing very well that I had scored 100% with my gals, the coolest guy at the party just hit at me and I got his contacts, just like that!     

My Story Begins     

Struggling to text someone after the first date is evident; you can text yes because it’s a much smaller emotive asset than making a phone call.  The first impression always means everything. What now? Should you text tonight to say you had a good/great time or what? Or just wait for your date to text you? Because texting is such a low risk way of contacting someone, I still encourage men to text right away. But the best time is to trust your instincts and text when you are ready, though I don’t agree with that. He did text immediately when I got home which was a nice thing.

“Hey Stacy, had a great time at the party? I hope am not delinquent by at least not waiting for 24hours before texting?”

Since I was waiting for his text or call. That was absolutely charming, I just needed something random or clever to text back. With me there is no need to be asked out, I need you to be straightforward because you might wait like forever and it might never come out. Everyone thinks that the dude should do the asking out part, I totally disagree. I realized that the feeling was mutual, Alex was ready to go out with me. If you want it, why on earth would you die with something like that, will it hurt? Hell no! Dating him made me feel like the only girl in the world,” I think he is the type of dude I have been looking for”. He was the type set to spend his cash on you and not care how much was remaining. The connection seemed to be a long term relationship because we had very big dreams ahead of us, fantasies? Read ahead and be the judge.

 The fourteenth of February always seems to be flawless and mild. Chocolates, wines, cakes, flowers, cards, not forgetting the other very expensive gifts. Valentine’s Day should constantly have some affection notes and kisses. That day I went over to Alex’s place to visit him because he had invited me. We had so much fun, drunk some wine. We watched some passionate movie which left us all like, ‘iyo movie iko on point’. Are there rules about when to have sex for the first time with a new potential partner? I still don’t know that yet. With most of the African men, sex will always cross their mind not unless they don’t want to say it out. 

Both of you should act as adults, if she says she doesn’t want to have sex with you for a month, respect her! Or if she says she wants it on the first date and every day, respect that decision too! I didn’t want to act immature this time round because ‘sex’ had never crossed my mind…as they say ‘nlikua Virjo’.  The way all that came about am sorry I can’t say it out since I honorably don’t know how it actually occurred. Please don’t judge me, for all my teenage life I have always wondered what and how sleeping with a guy actually feels. All the same, after that you can feel excited, weird, terrified and uncomfortable at the same time, which I was.

 I dint even feel like going home, I wanted to his and him mine, the two of us just together for ages and ages to come. I had Alex that is what mattered most. But I had to go home; my parents would kill me if they even had a rumor that I had been seen with a guy. So he had to drive me back home before it got too late. On our way home, he makes a stop somewhere and pulls over his car. Being so innocent and not knowing what was happening I decide to ask why he was pulling over. He says that there’s something that I always wanted to tell you but did not have the courage to do it. Go ahead please, I urge him with the best seductive voice ever, knowing he was going to repeat the same magic words he said on out first meeting. “You are so lovely”

“Stacy please forgive me I know I have probably hurt your feelings but I am so sorry I did that. I have a wife and two kids and I don’t want to ruin my marriage because of this relationship. I love you yes but then…..”

I was like WTF! Hell No! Did I get you right? And we just had sex like some twenty minutes ago...Crying out loud. I didn’t even wait for him to finish because to me that was the most stupid thing that I have ever heard come out of a guy. I didn’t know what to do, cry or yell?! I was so confused. I took some note from my pulse and gave it to him without even saying a single word. The moment I opened the door to get out, all I heard was a loud bang and screeches. The note that I had given him was written “WITHOUT YOU, I CANNOT LIVE’.

Alex was the perfect guy; yes the coward was married and interested in the honey jar. Either way I am wiser and know that the perfect guy never exists, you would rather grab one and mold him to your own perfection levels, I told myself just before I heard mom voice; "Stacy, leo umeamua ni kulala?" (Mom, calling and asking whether I was going to wake up at all) It just occurred to me that all this was in a dream, no Alex, no party, no nothing?!

But this must have been a unique dream, a dream with critical life lessons to anyone out there in their prime teen age, or in the dating field. No one is perfect, you either want to live with their faults/imperfections or you continue with the search for Mr./Ms Right. The search which might go on forever.

Have a blessed life!